We are our message. We are our own story. We give voice and life and meaning and passion and purpose to the words gifted to us by the Divine. When we bypass the ego - the part of us that says we can’t say that or who am I to claim such a thing - when we ignore that chatter in our head and allow the message to flow from our mouths and through our fingers, that is when we create real impact in the world.
Truth is, we were born knowing our purpose. We were designed to do this work. It is our destiny, our incarnate responsibility to honor. Then, life gets in the way. Society and media get in the way. Ego and fear get in the way. We buy into the belief that we have to "search" for our true identity, our life's purpose. We seek outside help to uncover what has been inside us all along.
We make living our purpose difficult. We make speaking our truth painful. We make following our deepest desires fearful.
We don’t have time to worry about if our hair looks good before clicking LIVE to share our message.
We don’t have the luxury of waiting until we have all the pieces in place before offering a solution. We don’t have the heart to put our fears in front of the needs of others. Because we are the ones who are focused on making money and making a difference.
What you have to say is what the world needs to hear - right now. Things will never get better if the ugly truth stays in the shadows. No amount of spiritual bypassing will ever make our shameful past go away. You can't "love and light" this shit out of existence nor can you LOA it out of the DNA of our sister of color.
My favorite childhood memory is playing around-the-neighborhood hide-and-seek. Most of the kids - maybe 10 of us - would break into teams and hide in fields, up in trees. underneath bushes. And, as you can guess, I was a master hider. Inside the safety of tall pine trees were my favorite places to spend time - day or night.
But now is the time to stop hiding, and go seek what makes me whole, what challenges my beliefs, what demands my attention so that I may change the world, and myself.
Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone deserves to be heard. It's what I live my life by. What I've built my business on. How I approach each person and every situation.
What is the story that needs to be shared at this time? What story will have the most impact? What story will spark the most conversation or create the most change?
What if what I need to say needs to be heard, right now?
What if what I need to teach needs to be learned, right now?
What if what I need to disrupt needs to be shifted , right now?
Can I wait for this stranger within to get tired of hiding? Can I wait for her to find her courage, to overcome her fear?
I am tiptoeing into this space - into a place I wouldn’t wish upon my enemy. To face off against the worst in others - the judgement, hatred, bigotry, shame, guilt, disgust they have for fat people - and stand for who I know I am - to hopefully spark a conversation around being seen for who we (all of us) are not what we (all of us) look like.
I am not ready for it.
It is not my job to make your life comfortable.
It is so much easier to stay numb. To just get by - day to day - and only opening yourself up to what is required to survive.
To limit your emotional response to only a small fraction of what is available because we've been taught that feeling too much is a bad thing.
But what if we could feel 2% happier? 2% more compassion? 2% more empathy? 2% more hope?
The worst advise I think anyone can receive when sharing their demons with the world is this,
"You can do anything you set your mind to."
Respectfully, I call BULL-SHIT.
First, it's not that simple.
Second, you are making them out to be a victim.
Third, if it were true, no one would ever give up on a dream.
Fourth, it offers no level of compassion or support.
Fifth, it takes more than mindset to accomplish anything.
Let's break these down, one-by-one.
He told me I talked too much and that I needed to only say things once but think about what I was saying so that people actually listened the first time I said it. He said I repeated by thoughts because I wasn't confident in what I was saying and that if I would be more thoughtful and concise with my words, people would take me more seriously.
Over the years, I've thought about that comment several times, passing it off as true, sometimes, absolutely ridiculous other times.
But it wasn't until today that I realized the damage it had done.
If you don’t know what you stand for...
If you aren’t clear on your values...
If you aren’t aligned with your goals...
If you can’t claim your desires...
Then how do you know where you are going and, most importantly, how will you know when you get there?
Will you even recognize yourself when you “arrive”?